Once again Naomi Campbell, you have made my day!

I just love how K-Fed is capitalizing on the fact that everyone hates him, like that's going to make him famous. NEWSFLASH!!!! The only reason you're famous is because you are married to a hasbin popstar who use might be skinny now after giving birth just about a month ago but she's still complete white trash. And wrestling...I'm not sure Mr.Federline if that should be your target audience.
TomKat has announced that they will wed in November and Posh Spice seems to be co-planning the wedding. I bet that something will inevitably happen and gosh the wedding won't happen in November. Tom will make up some lame excuse about how they have to spend more time with Suri but KATIE, THE REAL REASON IS THAT HE'S GAY!!!!! Why she hasn't realized that yet unless she legitimately lobotimized is beyond me.
Another imminent marriage is the one between Cocaine Addict Pete Doherty and Idiot Kate Moss, yes all in caps because those are their new titles. Kate Moss seems to think it's a really great idea to marry Pete Doherty who has been in rehab more times than he can count on his fingers in the past year along. Plus, he's extremely grungy and gross and will be probably turn little Lila into a drug addict too, accidentally put some coke into something instead of salt or sugar. Hey, if he's high it could happen.
For all of you who haven't seen a clip; YouTube, Popsugar and PerezHilton all have it, off Elizabeth Hasselbeck going crazy over the fact that there was a murder/rape victim on Law and Order: SVU named Elizabeth Hassenbeck. She thinks that it's offensive and rude and went so far as to call up the Execute Producer of the show and confront him. His response: promptly hanging up the phone after arguing. Elizabeth honey, you are not that famous that someone would base a character off of you and maybe you should realize that if it was based on you and that the character was murdered that's maybe how the writers feel about you because you whine and complain so much on The View. Maybe?
So when Sutton Pierce Federline was born there were tons of jokes about how he was the second SPF of the family. Lots of sunscreen jokes ensued but the truth has come out...We have all been living a lie, the baby's name is...Jayden James. Now come on, when are the new jokes going to start?
Anna Nicole Smith is having a rough couple months. She is now being kicked out of the Bahamas. Officials do not want her staying there anymore and it turns out that she is kind of staying in her current house under false pretenses and the original owner wants it back. I believe that if we all watch the first season of The Anna Nicole Show we will feel a lot better about her. Priceless.
I have saved the best for last. Naomi Campbell everyone's favorite bitchy supermodel has done again. She has been reportedly arrested for scratching the face of not a measly assistant but her DRUG COUNSELOR because that is a fantastic idea. Get into even more trouble. Why isn't she in a straight jacket in a mental institution because she is a real danger to society, what is this, the fifth time this year that Naomi has been arrested. Better yet, do nothing to her because she provides endless hours of fantastic entertainment. That's all for today but check back soon.

Live, Love and Breathe entertainment. I know I do.

Poor Nicole, a gay scientologist and a druggie...

Madonna needed to send her Malawian son's family a picture so I offered to do the honors and sent them this beauty. Jessica realized she hadn't been in the news this past week so staged getting arrested so that the spotlight could once again be on her. Her dad Joe is pitching a new show to MTV called JailBirds and it's starring Jessica and her double Ds. Ok, I really just liked this masterpiece that had been created and needed to put the pics into use some how.
So, how bad do you feel for Nicole Kidman. I mean first she had a gay scientologist of a husband who she had to pretend was straight and now a drug addict. Apparently it was written into the Kidban (that one was alllll mine)prenup that if Keith relapses and Nicole decides she wants a divorce then he gets nothing. I just feel so bad for Nicole, she doesn't deserve this. And speaking of her relationship with Tom did everyone forget the fact that he couldn't impregnate Nicole but miraculously could with Katie. This proves even further that the baby is Chris Kleins. Just thought I'd bring that up one more time.
Last week Sara Evans announced that she was quitting Dancing With the Stars because her husband was having an affair and she needed "family time". I have one question, who the HELL is Sara Evans and why do we care that her husband was having an affiar and that she quit? I had no idea who she was until I did some investigative work and found out she was a country star and oh yeah her husband has retaliated by saying that she had an affair also. Wow, these interesting people and their interesting story keeps getting better.
Madonna's new son David's birth dad says he's confused and didn't realize that Madonna was keeping David forever. Interesting, given the fact that last week the dad said that now his boy was finally going to have a happy life and could go far. Ya I guess not so far that David's daddy can't be on TV all the time and get interviewed. The fame is all he was after.
Here's my little plug. If you haven't seen Ugly Betty yet, please watch. It's my favorite new show of the season. The writing is clever, America Ferrera is fantastic and Salma Hayek is a very good Executive Producer. It's on Thursdays at 8 on ABC right before Grey's Anatomy. Also, I saw Marie Antoinette this weekend and Sofia Coppola has done it again. The movie is beautifully done and Kirsten Dunst and Jason Schwartzman were really good. The wait in between Coppola's movies are well worth it, since everyone is so artfully and well done.
Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan haven't been in the news in the past week so beware because that means their going to be coming back full force and better than ever.
Live, Love and Breathe entertainment, I know I do.

It's been a while but here I am...

So it's been a long time since I've written and I thought I'd start out this I'm sure much anticipated post with a wonderful picture of Patricia Arquette in that fantastic dress...just kidding if you couldn't catch the sarcasm. Seriously, did the dead people she communicates with in Medium not tell her that the look doesn't work?
Let's start with some TV basics... So for everyone who didn't already know, just when we all thought we were getting lucky and losing Seventh Heaven for good, the show that just keeps on giving decided to give some more. Although it was canceled at the end of last season, the CW brought it back because let's face it, nobody really wanted to say goodbye to the Camdens. Even though it was brought back, there had to be severe budget cuts. So the sets twins that Lucy, Mary and Matt's wife Sarah were all pregnant with at the supposed finale, ya well we never see Lucy or Sarah and Lucy had an abortion...oh wait that's unchristian, I meant she had a miscarriage. Ruthie is in some foreign country probably getting pregnant with some triplets or something so there will be more people in that house and Mama Camden is going to be NY for most of the season "helping" Mary with her babies. The good Ol' reverend is going to get a fatal heart disease BUT if the show does well then omigosh he will be miracurously cured...interested. Oh ya and there will be a character named T-Bone joining the cast. I wonder what God's idea of T-Bone is? Let's pray and hope that the show will be canceled before we ever find out.
So in my last long ago post, I predicted that Kidnapped would be canceled and haha I was right. All the networks better line up to start hiring me for a programming job because damn I'm good, I mean not to brag or anything. Seriously, does the word DUH mean anything to you. Joining Kidnapped is Smith and some other FOX dramas that nobody bothered to watch.
Now to the big news...PARIS AND NICOLE ARE BACK TOGETHER!!!! I know you're just peeing yourself right now with excitement. I know, it's like the whole fight was a publicity stunt or something. No, they would never overexpose themselves for no reason. But seriously, what did we do without this dynamic duo? I mean the The Simple Life 4 was definetly not as good because they were filmed seperately. TV suffered.
Some quick bits for those of you who haven't been paying attention:
Britney had baby number 2, another SPF...Sutton Pierce Federline
Suri Cruise on front of Vanity Fair...almost flipped out when I couldn't get a copy
Madonna adopts a Malwaian child...ok
House of Carters=Best Show EVER
Lindsay Lohan decided she can be an author too, I mean it's not that hard, Paris Hilton did it
Fergie is a recovering Crystal Meth Addict...loves it the most

Most importantly though...I"M BAAAAAACK!!

Check Back soon